It was inevitable that I would turn into a helicopter parent, constantly hovering to pave the way for my child. Hovering over a four year old is acceptable, but trailing an eight-year-old to see how he manages the neighborhood boys (who-just-might-be bullies) and upon seeing him exit the bathroom asking if he wiped, I'm thinking is just nuts. Yet I've done it.
The other night I attended a Love and Logic parenting seminar. The biggest take away was letting your child fail. What???? I thought my job was to raise him well enough that he didn't fail. The seminar leader was talking about small failures, missed homework assignments, forgotten lunches etc. But even those options are daunting. In this high-stakes era I'm supposed to be nonplused if my son opts not to do his homework? And no food in his stomach could mean a low-achieving school day. Yet, I get her point. Children are told there are consequences for their actions but we parents tend to protect them from any adverse ones.
But what if we didn't? The answer is life would be a lot more challenging for them. And - we hope but are often afraid to risk finding out - our children would find the resiliency that child experts say they have. It is like letting your child take off down the sidewalk on their bike sans training wheels and parental assist for the first time. Your heart is beating a drum meter of fear, but you know it has to be done.
