School is in session

In between the steps moving me through the days of my life, I find rare moments to take a breath. Unfortunately, I haven't used those moments to come here. School began, Jackson is in 2nd grade this year. I have high hopes but then I have every year since he let go of my hand and walked into kindergarten.

I have a strange dual relationship with school. I've spent much of my career writing about the highs and lows of public education, yet my husband and I chose a private school for our son. The cost is unfathomable in this sense: how can we spend upwards of $20,000 to educate one child and yet turn parismonious when it comes to educating millions of children? I'm doing what I must for my child; he needs the small, nurturing environment and freedom from rules characteristic of independent schools. He isn't ready to be held accountable in a formal, rigid manner. On this I'm unapologetic. 

My grandparents and parents went through hell to gain their progeny the right to walk into any classroom. Now we can. We have the legal and economic wherewithal to choose any academic setting. This is the civil right we all possess. Yet, it is fraught with peril every step of the way. I think my son is getting the best education possible, but some days I just don't know. I don't know if he is held to the same standard as other kids, whether he is encountering the stereotypes common for boys in the classroom, never mind kids of color. Is he seen as more than a justification for FTEs or as proof of a school's embrace of diversity? Is he more than a cog in the wheel? I think parents frequently wonder and for the most part we trust in the system, private or public,  and keep moving. But how? How do we keep moving?